Many people consider that being jealous they are just showing their partner how much they love her. However, there are certain types of jealousy that are very negative .
We have all been jealous people at some time.
If we had siblings, as children we could feel this strange feeling if our parents paid more attention to our brother or dedicated a certain compliment.
However, the issue of jealousy was something that has always been related to love in relationships. Phrases like “if you get jealous is that you love” we have believed them true.
However, although jealousy may be normal, jealous people make many mistakes blinded by this feeling that can damage their relationships. Do you want to know what they are?
1. Absorb your partner
Jealous people are very insecure and this causes them to try at all times to control their partner. They want it just for them. They do not support the idea that they can be interested in someone else.
This can cause the other person to feel very pressured and want some space in their relationship. This, no doubt, greatly alters the person who is jealous.
Astonishing the couple can cause an unwanted ending: the break . However, jealous people do not realize what the other person is feeling.
Their jealousy nullifies their empathy.
2. They are continuously searching for evidence
There is something known as a “pigmalion effect” that indicates that if a person believes that something is going to happen or acts as if it happened, in the end, it happens.
This happens to jealous people who are continually looking for any sign that their partner is unfaithful.
Any message or contact with someone can trigger a discussion full of reproaches and phrases like “you do not love me anymore!”.
This type of attitude can cause that, in the end, they end up finding what they were really looking for. It is as if it were a call for that to happen.
3. They refuse to seek help
The negative part of jealousy and believing that they are normal or that they indicate love for the other person is that the people who suffer them refuse to believe that they are a problem for their relationship.
This causes a huge wear and tear on the couple and, over time, the relationship ends up becoming very toxic to both of them.
The search for help would be very positive. Thus, the communication between the couple would improve and jealousy would be seen as unfounded beliefs and the result of fears that have no reason to be.
4. Jealousy does not end from one day to the next
As much as a couple who is jealous say “I’m going to change” the truth is that this is a whole process and it would always be good to have professional help.
Jealous people can make various promises when their partner, overwhelmed, threatens to leave them. However, we must bear in mind that the process will be long.
We must end with certain beliefs that have made jealousy something “normal” in relationships and, also, take a look at all those fears and insecurities that provoke them.
5. They explode suddenly
The jealous people, due to their distrust, usually are always of bad mood and before any small evidence their jealousy can arise and provoke an anger that, sometimes, they are saved.
In this way, when they have accumulated several moments of jealousy, in the least appropriate circumstance they end up exploiting. Your partner does not understand what is happening and the situation gets worse.
Before leaving do not miss: How to know if I am living a “toxic relationship” of a couple?
It would be positive for jealous people to realize that the solution is not for their partner to act in the way they want, but rather for them to change their views on relationship and jealousy.
Only then could they redirect the relationship towards a healthier one.
Otherwise, in most cases, excessive jealousy will lead to a breakup, as the situation will become untenable .