You enjoy being with that person. You have connected in a very special way.
However, overnight, you distance yourself without knowing very well why . This is the fear of commitment.
When we go through stormy relationships, full of bad times and suffering, it is very difficult for us to once again immerse ourselves in new bonds.
We are afraid of the possible future that we imagine in our mind, that they hurt us again or that we return to that state of constant unhappiness.
However, it is necessary that we know how to analyze and eliminate this fear . Well, living with fear is not really living.
Fear of commitment and pessimism
Undoubtedly, when we speak of fear of commitment, we are referring to people who are very pessimistic about relationships .
They have a very negative view of the links with other people, something fruit of very unpleasant experiences in the past.
But, above all, there is a great fear of losing the freedom that you now enjoy .
However, if you find yourself in this situation, it is important to understand that even if your relationship has gone badly, this does not mean that it will be a constant.
That is, it does not imply that later ones are equally negative, unless the reason why you submerge yourself in harmful relationships has something to do with you.
What does this mean?
Keep in mind: Being discouraged is normal, being pessimistic
Suffering jealousy, insecurity or emotional dependence can cause you to attract certain types of couples without being aware of it. People who mistreat you, who use you or manipulate you …
Take advantage of that moment when you are not in a relationship to solve any difficulty that is preventing you from maintaining healthy relationships .
The assessment of individual needs
Many people believe that some people with a fear of commitment who do not want relationships and think only of themselves are egocentric and selfish.
However, this is a misunderstanding. People with this type of fear have simply learned to value their needs before those of others.
In other words, they have learned to give themselves the value they deserve and do not need anyone to care for them and love them, since they already do it themselves.
It may be difficult to understand this, since we are immersed in a society that makes us think of the other before us.
It forces us, in a certain way, to love without conditions and to support certain situations that are justified under the word “love”.
But, people with fear of commitment have learned to be alone . Something that many, if not all, we should experience.
Remember: Nobody deserves more love than yourself
Because many problems in relationships are based on not knowing how to love without possessing, without insecurity, without fear of loneliness.
People with the fear of compromise, once they overcome this, manage to maintain much more enriching relationships , because they know how to be alone and do not depend on a couple to be happy.
The limiting beliefs
A person with this type of fear has many limiting beliefs that swarm through his mind.
Although this fear has something positive, such as knowing how to be alone and giving priority to oneself, it is true that there is a certain discomfort due to this barrier that has arisen due to insecurity .
In some way, you can not free yourself from that past that haunts you and remind you that relationships are negative and bad.
In some cases, this type of considerations cause the person to isolate himself, to flee from any bond, be it a couple or friendship.
It is difficult, though not impossible, to get rid of all these beliefs that cause fears that cause the sensation of being trapped.
However, if it is uphill, it is always positive to go to a professional who will guide you and provide you with the necessary tools to avoid limits and to enjoy a good relationship if it comes up and you like someone.
Before leaving, do not miss: There are disappointments that make you open your eyes and close your heart
It is normal to be afraid of commitment if you have recently ended a painful relationship. However, if this fear extends over time, it is necessary to seek help.
Fear is never positive and, although it is difficult, it is necessary to look it in the face and kill it. Do not let it overtake you or control your life .
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