Entering a relationship and giving up on yourself will never be a good idea . Sometimes we do it, unconsciously. That’s why today we will discover what we should look for so that this does not happen.
When you enter into a relationship and choose to renounce yourself, the first thing that happens is that you stop being happy. Even if you refuse to assume this, even if you lie to yourself, this is the first consequence.
However, in what situations do you choose to renounce yourself?
Renounce yourself for emotional dependence
Emotional dependence is a problem that exists in a large part of relationships . In summary, we can say that the other person is the owner of our happiness.
For this reason, people with emotional dependence live by and for their partner. They take care of it, they are careful not to do anything that might bother them and they get attached in such a way that they look like a pack, not as independent people.
The reason is that they believe that by themselves they can not be happy . Therefore, they leave this responsibility in the hands of another person. The big problem is that, in doing so, they renounce themselves.
What happens if you choose to renounce yourself because you suffer emotional dependence? What may happen is that you are in any of the following circumstances:
- If your partner leaves you or the relationship ends you quickly look for a substitute , because, as your happiness depends on the other person as well as your life, if you do not have a partner, it ends.
- You may look in the mirror and not know who you are . You have renounced yourself, what you liked, your values, who you were. Now you are not able to recognize yourself .
- Your life revolves around your partner, that’s why you abandon friends, activities and even the family. Your priority is your partner and if it leaves you, you have nothing left.
- Sometimes you feel an inner emptiness that you do more doing things for your partner. You need to quiet that voice inside you that screams at you that you’re missing out .
Never give up your happiness for your children
Sometimes, we maintain a relationship because we believe that children should grow up in a united family home and that they do not have to go through the harsh trance of separation.
However, at home there are always arguments, shouting, fights, anger and fights that turn the environment into which they are educated in harmful and unbalanced.
Renouncing yourself, your happiness, your children is not reasonable. They will be happier the more you are. In fact, they will be happier with separated but happy parents , who are not together but sad and angry all the time.
Think that you are the model they are going to follow . Also, that everything they see, hear and feel in their childhood will affect their future relationships.
Come back to recover
Whether you have renounced yourself because you are in a relationship, or if you have renounced it for your children, it is important that you know that you can recover again.
At the beginning it will not be easy. You’ve spent a lot of time becoming who you were not. Admitting situations that humiliated you and believing that you could not make decisions.
Have you ever looked in the mirror and asked yourself “who am I”? Asking yourself this question indicates that you have lost yourself and that it is time to embark on a reunion trip.
Seek professional help if necessary, even if you have all the tools to recover again. Of course, you may not see them yet.
Before leaving, do not miss: Self-knowledge: what are its advantages?
Giving up on you for a couple is not worth it. Renounce yourself for the happiness of your children when, perhaps, they are being much more unhappy than you think, either.
Do not leave in a second place. You are the first person you have to take care of and the one you have to know best. Do not give up on you ever.
Images: Laura Williams, Aliza Razell.